I can lock the physical reminders away, but my thoughts still fail to stray.

Crash

     It was the evening of Friday, April 10. It was rapidly growing dark, and my headlights were on. I was driving down a quiet residential road here in town. To be honest, I was going faster than I should have been, and I made the unforgivable mistake of becoming distracted and looking away from the road. I had neared the end of the street and needed to slow to make the turn; however, I wasn't paying attention and didn't realize this until it was too late.
     When I looked up from whatever had distracted me, I saw only a tree directly in front of my car. There must have been a loud noise with the impact of my little Honda Civic meeting the rough, sturdy tree.
     There was blackness for a second, a minute. I opened my eyes to see a white airbag right in front of my face and a small stream of smoke emurging from the crunched-up hood of my car.
     I panicked. This sort of thing didn't happen to me. I was a safe driver. Well, up until now.
     I wrenched open the car door and felt a searing pain in the back of my head.
     And then I ran.

Dimensions: 5th Reading Assignment

A Bend in the River
Parts 11, 12
(Pages 167-196)

Part Eleven:
     After the steamer left, Yvette and Salim went to the Tivoli (a resturant) for a snack. Yvette saw a family in the resturant that upset and angered her. Salim was a little frightened and bewitched by her attitude toward them; he had never experienced a woman who showed such irritations. Yvette invited Salim to a business-type lunch the next day.
     The lunch at Yvette's had been cancelled, but Salim still went because he hadn't been told about the cancellation. Salim was led to the same room the party had been held in, but it was much different than before. In the bright sunlight shining through the windows, Salim noticed cracks in the walls, dust on the record player, and no feeling of shelter in this home. He then saw Yvette as an ordinary housewife until she appeared; his fascination with her returned.
     Salim invited Yvette to the Hellenic Club for the next afternoon. This would be the second day in a row of a planned get together and the third day of seeing one another overall. When Yvette got to Salim's flat, they didn't go to the Club. They made love, which was special to Salim because of his obsession with her. This was the start of their affair.
     A few days before this, at Yvette's house, Salim had requested to see some of Raymond's writings in order to get closer to Yvette. When he ended up reading them, he realized that Raymond didn't have as much real knowledge of Africa as the people Salim himself knew. Raymond didn't see "the strangeness and wonder" of Africa like Father Husimans had.

Chapter Three: The Big Man
Part Twelve:
     Salim speculates that if he had read the articles by Raymond when Yvette had first given them to him, then he probably wouldn't have gotten "entangled" with her. Now he realizes Yvette's "ambition, bad judgement, and failure." Salim wanted to be "taken up to the skies," not be involved with someone who was "just as trapped" as himself.
     (I used a lot of small quotes from page 183 when summarizing the start of this chapter. I feel like those quotes are the best way to show how Salim was feeling regarding his new discoveries about Yvette.)
     Salim has photographs of Yvette that she had given to him. Salim further explains his relationship with Yvette in his narration. The reader learns that, by some unspoken agreement, the two didn't exchange tender words, embrace upon meeting, and seldom kissed.
     Yvette begins to talk about when she met Raymond and her meetings with the President. She seems more affected than Raymond about not hearing from Indar or someone else from the capital. Salim notices that Raymond is at a place that is now his home, while Yvette doesn't feel that way.
     Salim visits Yvette's house sometimes for dinner with other visitors. Raymond is always working in his study and usually never comes out until it's time to eat.
     A small book of the President's speeches is published, but it is not Raymond's. At first there is a high demand for it but the hype soon dies down. Salim can see that Yvette is growing bored with the subject of the President. Yvette's restlessness is a bad thing for Salim; he doesn't want her to leave.

Dimensions: 4th Reading Assignment

A Bend in the River
Parts 9, 10
(Pages 140-167)

Part Nine:
     On the same evening of the party, while Salim is still excited from the mood of earlier in the evening, Indar begins to acknowledge his depression aloud. Salim narrates, "the moonlight that made me light-headed deepened his depression, and it was out of this depression that he began to speak." (Page 141) This section of the book was filled with Indar telling his personal story of how he came to be where he is now.

Part Ten:
     In the beginning of part ten we are told that Indar had started telling Salim his story on the night of Yvette's party (which we already knew) but that he had added to it at later times. Salim then outright admits that he is obsessed with Yvette. The reader already knew he was starting to develop strong feelings for her on the night he met her because of the context and foreshadowing. Then we find that Salim felt protective toward Indar, because of his stylishness, exagerations, and delusions. Salim felt sad that Indar would be leaving soon. Indar didn't want Salim to see him off. When the time did come for Indar to leave, he left without a big goodbye. Ferdinand also left the Domain, and Salim felt that the Domain was forever closed off to him.
     Salim then backtracks a little to talk about Ferdinand's leaving. He would be making a trip to the capital, which was important to him. He didn't want to make a big deal out of it; on page 158, Salim narrates, "The journey to the captial was important to Ferdinand; and because it was important, he wished to play it down." Unlike when Indar left, Salim was there to see Ferdinand off. Ferdinand would be travelling in a first-class cabin, which "suggested luxury."
     Ferdinand and Salim decided to explore one of the two "cabine de luxe." It turned out that Indar's plane that was supposed to leave the day before had been taken out of service by the President, so Indar would be on the steamer in one of these extra-special first-class cabins. Yvette was seeing him off, and for a moment Salim felt very jealous and anxious. When it was time for the steamer to leave, Salim stood with Yvette to watch it go. His thoughts changed; at first he had felt that he would be the one with the hard journey of his "little life" but now he felt Indar had the hard journey ahead of him since he had been sent away.

Dimensions: 3rd Reading Assignment

A Bend in The River
Parts 7, 8
(Pages 107-140)

     Part seven of the reading starts out with Indar coming to the town. Salim and Metty knew Indar from their home on the coast, but Salim didn't particularly get along with him. Metty was overjoyed to see an old face in their new town, but Salim was dissappointed with who the visitor turned out to be. However, Salim ended up hosting a personal tour of his town for Indar. Salim learns that Indar was staying at the Domain as a "guest of the government" (because of his job). Salim attended a seminar at the polytechnic that Indar spoke at. The discussion turned to religion in Africa. Ferdinand was also there, and got rather riled up at one point. Even though Salim likes going to the Domain, he enjoys coming back to his town too.
     In part eight, Salim attends a party on the Domain, with Indar, that is hosted by Yvette. Her husband, Raymond, is "the Big Man's white man." This mean he advises the President. Raymond shares the story about how he met the President, and how he believes the President is doing a good job in ruling Africa. Raymond says "It takes an African to rule Africa." Salim agrees wholeheartedly. After the party, Indar and Salim listen to the rapids in the moonlight. Salim tells Indar that he was stuck here, in his new town, until Indar came and gave Salim the ability to see what was going on in the Domain just a few miles over.

Workstudy

     I now have a workstudy, which is available to financial aid students. I'm working in the office at CCV this semester. I have my own desk, computer, and telephone. I direct calls, schedule appointments, make copies, answer questions, and do cleaning. I don't mind this job because it pays pretty well and the staff here are friendly and it's enjoyable to work with them. I also have down-time where I can work on homework assignments or Student Advisory Board stuff (I'm currently the only SAB rep at the Springfield site).
     This is my first real job. I've had money-making gigs in the past, like baby sitting jobs and one Christmas season I was a "greeter" for a family's Christmas Tree Farm. But with this job I'm learning new skills and making real references for my future resume.
     I often look into the future and wonder what I'll decide to major in. Here at CCV, I'm earning my Associate's Degree in Liberal Studies. But my plan, after two years here, is to transfer into a four-year school as a junior. This way I'll already have the credits for the main courses when I go into a larger, more expensive, school, and I won't have to spend more time there then is necessary.
     I'm not one for dorm living. This workstudy is providing me with a nice pool of money, and I've been saving it. In two years, when I'm nineteen, I hope to get an apartment with a roomate that's close to my new campus (wherever that may be!).

Multimedia Video Project

"We Support Planned Parenthood"

My video project for Mulitimedia Apps & Tools is going to be a bunch of clips that have been filmed solely for this video. Each clip will have someone different saying one or two reasons why they support Planned Parenthood. There might be a little music but I'm not sure yet. There will also be a few facts about PPH- what they are, what they do, who they help- in my video.

I chose this subject for my project because it's something that I'm passionate about. I don't want Planned Parenthood to lose its federal funds because they help so many people.

So far I've only had one problem. A lot of the people I have gotten to help out (by creating a group on Facebook and adding the people I thought would be interested in helping) are able to shoot their video clip and send it to me. But for those who aren't able to film themselves, I can use my iPod touch. The videos from my iPod load onto my computer without a problem, and they are decent quality. However, when I upload them onto Jaycut, which is the site we're using to edit our videos, the clips are rotated the wrong way. And I can't figure out how to rotate them the right way.

I'm sure I'll find a solution, and I look forward to the final product.

Dimensions: 2nd Reading Assignment

A Bend in The River
Parts 4, 5, 6
(Pages 59- 107)

     Part four was a short section about Salim's visit to return the stolen ledger to Father Huismans at the lycee. The first time Salim went, Father Huismans was away, and Salim met with a Belgian teacher instead. The teacher was unhappy with his job and very irritable. Salim's second attempt to return the book was a success. Father Huismans was an optimistic priest who respected, and collected, African beliefs and artifacts. Salim notices that Father Huismans finds himself a last lucky witness to the dying African civilization.
     In part five Salim learns that the war hasn't really ended, as it begins to errupt all around his town. On page 67, Salim narrates "And the war, which we had thought dead, was all at once around us. We heard of ambushes on roads we knew, of villages attacked, of headmen and officials killed." Salim put his gold and valuable things into a crate, along with some of Metty's, and buried it. White soldiers came to Salim's town. Later, in the early state of peace, Father Huismans was murdered. The spiritual African things he had collected lost their value to Salim; eventually a tourist came and took them away.
     Part six starts out the second chapter of the novel, which is titled "The New Domain." Projects were started around the town; the population grew. Mahesh, who Salim was becoming friends with, had a deep yearning and interest for small business ventures. He would order a machine from far away, thinking that he could profit from it. He seldom did. Mahesh also got involved in some illegal stuff, and a few times Salim would have to help him out by hiding these things. Later, Mahesh began to make a profit from running Bigburger. The President, or "Big Man" as Salim sometimes says, had wanted to show them a new Africa. The town became modern, and in this, lost many of its old, sacred African ways. The Domain, a few miles from Salim's town, became a university that Ferdinand was able to attend on a scholarship. Salim began to hate the place; he wished for a home he had lost. At the end of this section we find that Metty had a child and hadn't told Salim about it. Things are quickly changing for Salim.

Dimensions of Freedom: Definitions

Genocide: The extermination of a particular group.
Democide: Murder by the government.
Ethnic cleansing: The elimination of an ethnic group (or groups) from a society.
Holocaust: A mass slaughter or reckless destruction of life, especially by fire.

My definitions were derived from http://www.dictionary.com/.

Out of Sight, Still in Mind

After a few weeks of struggling to see what was written on the whiteboard at school it was decided I would visit the eye doctor.
There, we found that I am near-sighted and need glasses in order to clearly see things in the distance.

When I put on my new pair of glasses, custom for my eyesight, it was like seeing a whole new world. I had never realized that objects and faces in the distance were supposed to be clear and focused and not slightly blurred.
I was ecstatic. There was a whole new world that I could see!

At times I would focus on an object in the distance while wearing my glasses. Then, I would lower them and look at the object with only my plain eyes. I would determine the difference and gladly slide my glasses back on.

However, after a while this new enthusiam about wearing glasses wore off. Thankfully I was in a more mature age range when I first got my glasses, so I never had to endure remarks like "four-eyes." But I had begun to grow uncomfortable wearing glasses. I mean, I appreciated the ability to focus on far-away things, but I wished I had that necessity with my naked eyes.

One day, I was walking home in the rain. Water streaked my glasses and I could hardly see. What a change from the relief my glasses usually provided me with! Here I was, glasses before my eyes, and for once my vision wasn't better without my glasses on.
The rain was chilly, so when I stepped into my entrance-way I was bombarded with warmth. The heat then fogged my glasses.
I removed them, and lo and behold, I could see better without the steamy glass before my eyes.

To Study or Not To Study?

Study. Study, study, study.
The answer is always study.
Because if you don't, you'll fall behind. You'll get a poor grade on your midterm exam, and you'll feel cruddy about it.

I don't like to study. It's not fun; it's boring. But part of taking a class is the studying aspect of it. You can't just expect to pass the class if you don't study for tests or quizzes.

I didn't study.
I had two weeks.
Two whole weeks!
My professor even provided us with a study guide! But I didn't take advantage of this.
I didn't study at all.

On the morning of the midterm, before my 9 o'clock class began, I tried to fill out the study guide.
I didn't have enough time to do this.

I had procrastinated and chosen to do other things instead.
This was a huge mistake.

I knew I would regret it when it was time to sit down and take the midterm.

And I did.
But there is no going back; I can only learn from this and not make the same choice again in the future.

So if anyone ever asks you, "To study or not to study?"
Always, always, say STUDY!

Out of the House

     I'm sixteen years old, but already in college. It's my first semester at a community college, and since I took the initiative to get out of high school and into college early, I feel that shows maturity. I just wish my mother would understand this.
     My mom was very supportive when I got out of high school and earned my GED, and she still is now that I'm in college. I still live with her, and it's an easy ride because I don't have to pay the rent or electric bills. I'm also usually able to borrow the car when she isn't working, which I appreciate. I realize that it's a privilege and not a right, but I still have to follow the childish curfew of ten on school nights.
      I'm responsible. I can honestly say that I've never tried cigarettes, drugs, or alcohol. I don't have any inclination to do so. I do my homework, attend class, and do what's asked of me around the house. I think that I shouldn't be held back by the same restrictions of less mature individuals. I want to be able to go out and see some friends after my evening class.
     But my mom doesn't trust me, even though I haven't given her any reason not to. (Well, okay. Last week after class- I had the car- I ignored her demands to be home by midnight and was out until one thirty. But this was the first, and last, time that I'm going to let that happen! Why can't she realize that?) Shouldn't she be pleased that I'm not like most of the teenagers roaming around, skipping school, and getting involved in some pretty bad sh*t?
     So last night, when I wasn't allowed to go anywhere or do anything even though it was still relatively early- a little before 9 pm- I told her I'd find somewhere else to live. I'm sixteen years old so I don't have to stay with a parent if I choose not to.
     I'd love to get an apartment and a car, but I know that right now, financially, that wouldn't be ideal for me. At least I'll have a source of income when I begin my work-study...